Oh how I know better. You have such a lovely Cobb salad with super crumbly BACON and avocados to die for. I have eaten it many times. And yes, my tummy doesn't like it but you are a party in my mouth.
Being a French bakery, you have so many other yummy delights. Pastries and breads and cakes galore. I am good. I stay away from them, but today, I decided to indulge myself.
Do you know what my favorite dessert is in the whole wide world? Coming in just a notch above Baked Alaska (which I will have as wedding cake, btw) is Creme Brulee. The crunch of the crusty top, the smooth creamy pudding-type gunk underneath, maybe some fruit on top. Ahhhh, pardon me whilst I have a smoke.
Well, French Bakery, you are French, you make dessert, I expect to be awed. You have let me down.
My creme brulee looked lovely. And as I dug into it, imagining the ecstacy that would soon follow, something punched me in the side of the head. Ack! What is in my mouth?!?! The texture is wrong, it's too runny, the top is not crusty, and worst of all the taste. Has the French Bakery just tried to poison me?
Do you know what it tastes like? Of course you don't. Let me tell you. It tastes like what a relaxer smells like (that's a hair perm for the gents or non-relaxer havin folks). So imagine you're expecting sweet goodness and you get a curly tongue.
MOTHER F-ING DISGUSTING!
Anywho, disappointment reigns at this lunch hour. And a lot of water is needed. Lather, rinse, repeat.