I'm sitting here at my desk at work and I receive an email from someone here in the company that I don't recognize. It was obviously sent to many people. The email went something like this:
Your mission, should you choose to accept, is to report to the 5th floor to pick up a package. We cannot tell you what is in the package, you must pick it up yourself to find out. The codeword is "Service Award".
I was slightly confused by this little note. Not only by its level of vagueness, but by the fact that today, or this month, or even this year is nothing special. I started through a temp agency on 1/4/06 and was hired on permanently on 4/13/06. Seeing as how I just can't stand to not know things, I chose to accept the mission.
I went into stealth mode and took the silent (but deadly) route to the 5th floor. I dodged cleaning crew to get there, but I made it. Under the cover of florescent lights, I gave the codeword and received my package. I left the dungeon of doom to return to the sanctuary that is my desk. I now have in my hands two things: a small, flat, white container approximate 5" by 6" and a slightly larger black container measuring 7" by 4" by 5". I decide that good things come in small packages (quite like myself) and open the white container first. It is a card. I open it and to my surprise it reads like this:
Warmest congratulations on your 1st year Anniversary with Company XYZ! Your dedication and commitment are an important part of our success.
We wish you health, happiness and continued success in the years to come!
XYZ Corporation – 2007
Right about now, you may be thinking the same thing that I was thinking as I read those words: Did I forget how to do math? I mean, I know that I'm not a "degreed professional" but I can still do the easy stuff like add.
The second container had a one year anniversary pin and a lovely pen set. Super! Man I am one ungrateful bitch.