Two guys at the next table. Yeah, Im drinking in a bar, so what.
Guy 1: I'm gonna tell you something but when I tell you, you can't act surprised or I get to gut you with a butter knife.
Guy 2: Okay
Guy 1: My salary is 450% of yours. How's that? Does that feel like a kick in the nuts or getting stabbed with a butter knife?
Guy 2:
What a douche.
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hahaha! I'd have calmly stabbed him in the head with a fork.
(sounds like you need a couple drinks!)