ROCO Friday – Prank Calls and Stuff edition

Well, well, well, my good people of the ROCO congregation.  It's been a while since I've heard the mighty collective voice ring out, so say it loud and say it proud…


And now that the good Reverend MiamiShyner can see all of you in the back row due to the wonder of contacts, I expect to see you more often.  Not just on holidays!  You know who you are! 😛

Let's suppose that you are a Congresswoman. (Ileana Ros-Lethtinen) And your constituents are of an area where radio folk like to play pranks.(Miami)  What do you do when someone calls you claiming to be a soon-to-be high-ranking official? (Barack Obama)  Well, of course, you HANG UP ON HIM!  Ha!  Gotta love that one.

Wisdom has just been passed along to me.  This message of sure genius is as follows:

Bacon = Meat candy

Mmmm, bacon.

This is my last lazy ROCO Friday because I got clearance to do light cardio…and to buy naughty bits from Vickie's.  Life is good.

Tomorrow is Cirque day finally!  But no, I'm not excited or anything.  And I'm totally not already thinking about the next show that's coming in May and when I'll be able to afford to buy those tickets.  Nope, not thinking about that at all.

Well, my good people, I know that no one likes when the preacher goes on for too long, so let me close the sermon and move to the back so that I can shake hands and kiss babies (with gloves and a mask..I don't want your cooties).

I'm glad that you could join me and I look forward to seeing you next week.  Let the congregation say ROCO!

And remember, there is no confession for doing bad in this church, only for not living life full-out, balls to the wall.  Go out and spread the word!

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10/30 – A couple of things

Please know that I am not happy that ANYONE is losing their job, ever.  And that my happiness regarding the next sentence stems from this.

DHL is basically ending its US service.  But seriously, their service has been so bad, from my experience, this is really not a surprise.

Here's another little nugget.  You should exercise and get lots of calcium, especially if you are a woman.  MommaShyner just found out that she has osteopenia.  Nothing on too serious of a level, she just needs to exercise and get more calcium, which SHE BETTER!  I know you read this, Mom!

And since I know you're reading this, I am going to share this because I thought it was funny in a downer sort of situation.  MommaShyner said that she didn't think that this was something that really affected "us".  You know, like Black folks "us".  Um, we've still got bones and we're still female, so that's more or less who these sorts of conditions target.

It's not like we're white and she found out she had sickle cell, because then she could say "Damn, I didn't think that sort of thing really affected "us"!"  I love my MommaShyner.

In case you're wondering, the girls are coming along nicely.  Although the range of motion I have at home is considerably diminshed when I'm at work because it's colder than the proverbial witch's tit in our freaking office!  Today, I couldn't even use a pencil because my hands were so cold.  I think I may just take my Steelers fleece into the office tomorrow to stay warm.  Or I'll really piss them off and get one of these.  That's right.  A slanket.

That's probably enough links for today.  Peace out till tomorrow ya'll!


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6/30 – Nervous trainwreck

Typically, when something is bothering me or weighing heavily on my mind, I tend to share it with you and it usually helps so I'm going to try it again now.

I've had this surgery scheduled for over a month now and I've been fine with it.  Until a couple of hours ago.  I'm not saying that I'm going to back out, or that I'm scared, per se, but nervous is really starting to creep up on me.  Seriously.  To the point of clock watching and saying "Is it 10pm yet so I can take an Ambien and go to sleep?!?!"

My heart's beating a little faster than usual today and my tummy is a little grumblier than usual too.

….OMG SERIOUSLY…if this lady doesn't stop cutting her nails at work, I'm going to have to donkey punch her!…..

All of the people at the facility are super nice, as is the doctor.  He's been at this a while, so it isn't as though I think he doesn't know what he's doing.  He's got good stats and I know someone that's visited him.

It isn't as though I think I'm going to die on the table.  Because that's irrational.  I'm healthy and too stubborn to die..yet.  Okay, maybe it did cross my mind.  Along with the thought of getting cut open and steam hissing out or an alien jumping out too, so we don't really give that one much thought.

I've got more support than a (insert your own analogy here…I couldn't think of something that wouldn't offend somebody).  MommaShyner, BruddaShyner, Lovey, Kiddo, Roboco, they're all behind me.

I should have asked for a Valium, but I probably wouldn't have made it to work today.

I'm still waiting for them to call to confirm my arrival time.  And like Tom Petty said, "The waiting is the haaaardeeeeeeeeest paaaart."

I'm starting to feel a little better.

Maybe it's because this is my first surgery, sorta.  I don't count having my wisdom teeth out although they did knock me out for that.  I've never been sliced.

Wisdom of BruddaShyner regarding possible pain: Hey, you pooped out a kid, it can't be worse than that.

Yep, he said POOPED out a kid.  Gotta love that guy.

HAHA, I have homework to do also.  Fortunately, I've done well throughout the rest of the class and I don't have to put forth a full effort to get an A and I can really provide a half-assed effort and still get a B.  I could not participate at all and still get a C.  Not that I would do that because that's just wrong.  Even though one of the classes is Computers for Those Without Opposable Thumbs.  Honestly, it's painfully silly.  Forcing me to turn in a project that must be created in WordPad…you do the math.

Oh, feeling a little better still.

I got to do some shopping, and that's always cool.  Did I mention it?  I don't recall.  One suit, one skirt, three or four blouses…$108.  Hell yes bargain shopper.

Really, I just want to fast forward to being healed up enough to get back to my circus workouts.

Would you like a Starburst?  BINGO!  Two strawberry ones!!

I am excited to take a day off of work.  Maybe even two.  I haven't decided if I will come in on Monday yet.  Not supposed to drive whilst taking Percocet or Flexoril, lol.



So, this is an old photo where I have yet again accomplished the puppy dog head tilt. Maybe I will wear this outfit to Cirque in one month (!) so I'll have a before and after photo.  My hair is already quite a bit longer now.  Like if I do the tilt, it still reaches my shoulders on both sides.  Me and photos don't always get along.  Or maybe it's just my perception.  I do always look, uh, well, greasy.  Stupid skin.  Dry until the second I put on any makeup.  Doesn't even matter what kind it is!  I've tried 'em all.  Oh well, at least I have nice teeth. 😀

Hey hey, look, another storm is brewing down there by Honduras.  It's not supposed to make a US landfall though.  Keeping those fingers crossed.  I guess you really can't call hurricane season until the 30th.  I will not miss hurricanes when we move.

Okay, I've rambled enough now, and if you're still reading this, you either really like me or you're bored to tears.  Either way, thanks for hanging around and listening/reading me blabber on about nothing.

I may have one more of these today, but if not, see you on the other side of anesthesia!

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1/30 – Start out strong

So, late in the game I've decided to try to spit out a post a day for 30 days.  I already know that this will be difficult considering that there's a lot of stuff going on this month.  But, hey, what the hell, it's worth a shot.

A couple of things for me:

  • 5 days till surgery
  • 35 days till Cirque du Soleil
  • 38 days till my birthday
  • 43 days till the Associates degree
  • 70 days till vacation

Today, I talked to Kiddo about going to the gyno.  She is NOT excited.  Granted, she should be safe for a few more years, but yeah, she dosen't want to go.  Ever.  Am I wrong in explaining the difference between a pap, a colposcopy and cryosurgery?  Maybe.

Mmmm, today I had the Buffalo chicken sandwich from Wendy's.  Lovey says it was really spicy, but he didn't have the blue cheese sauce on his.  Mine wasn't spicy at all.  Sadness.  I like spicy though.  A lot.

Earlier today (or last night), I made a promise to some dead relatives about action I would take if they pulled out all the winning lotto balls for me.  Tomorrow morning I'll know what needs to be done.

Ah, and most importantly for today.  At 8am, I woke up from an Ambien induced sleep, promptly got dressed and hopped on my bicycle.  I rode for approximately 20 minutes to the library where I stood in line for three, count em, THREE hours in order to cast my vote.  Thank goodness for early voting.  These are important times, my friends, and whether you agree with my choice of candidates (That One, the socialist, Marxist, communist, spread the wealth, illegal aunt hiding black guy) or not, I hope you realize the importance of making your voice heard.  EVERY VOTE COUNTS!!  So get out there and vote.  For Obama.  All the cool kids are doing it.  Well, you know, except for Stephen Baldwin who says that, you know, if there was a rally with a bunch of hip-hop people, since that's the demographic, ugh…I can't even repeat the rest of that.

Have a lovely November all.  See you tomorrow. 

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Two boobs, or not two boobs

I may have previously mentioned that Lovey and I will be attending the wedding of his best friend att he end of March.  It began that I was working out 5 or 6 days a week in preparation for the shindig, but now, I keep working out because it makes me feel good and I'm almost back to being in "circus shape" or at least looking like it since I know the core strength isn't there.

I was torn on what to wear to the wedding.  It's in Honduras so it's going to be hotter than hell.  I have, in my possesion, a total of three dresses.  One is ankle-length and sleeveless and I absolutely love it.  It holds many memories and has gone swimming in pools and oceans.  It will be too hot and sticky for that one though, I believe.  I have another that I wore two years ago to another of his friend's wedding and I like that one too but the current bride and groom were at that wedding and at our table, so I'm not wearing that one.  The third dress I also enjoy, but for some reason, in pictures, you can see my, um, personal boobage area right through the dress!  (It's black, so that's kinda weird.)  At any rate, I wore it to the current bride and groom's engagement party, so that one was out the window as well.  What's a girl to do?

Fortunately, I was gifted a dress, brand new with tags.  It's even designer of sorts I believe, but I don't follow that sort of thing.  It's the dress pictured but instead of the color shown, it's more of a rust color

For free and for something that I hadn't tried on, it's almost perfect.  It's a size 4 (or so it says on the tag) so I really didn't think that I was going to fit into it, but lo and behold I did.  Almost.  Can you see how the waistline is high and shirred?  Well, it fits from there down.  The top gaps open some where I'm supposed to have boobs.  <sigh>

I've been long contemplating having an enhancement.  Mainly for this exact reason.  Clothes don't fit me properly.  Seriously, I can't fit the boob area in a size 4 dress.  WTF is that?  Somehow I've made it 34 years, had a child and still can't fill a friggin B-cup.

Is it the end of the world?  No, of course it isn't.  Does Lovey care?  No.  I've got the same amount of boobs now as when he met me.  It's just me and my issues.

I am pretty sure that we've advanced far enough that having this procedure is relatively safe if done by a reputable doctor. (All surgery involves some risk.)  I realize that I'll be out of commission for a few days to a week.  But I can't really think of any other reason not to do it.  I'm not talking porn star DD's or anything here because that would just look stupid on my frame, but a small C would work wonders.

Why am I telling you this?  I don't know for sure.  I'd like to hear opinions, good stories, bad stories, pros, cons, whatever you've got.  I just want to look nice in my clothes.  Or without them.

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