Yikes, y’all. I can clearly see why I get nothing done. Now, can I somehow make myself fix it?
I give myself this time period to empty my head of these random thoughts before I fill it up again. When I write these, the first step is to find a song that somehow correlates to what I’m rambling about for the day. This is usually the first step in my downfall of how I don’t get something posted. Today it looked like this: I need a song about putting things off or getting things done. Off to Google and then down the rabbit hole. I ended up on lists of songs about procrastination (which I didn’t really want). Oh, then I needed to know what kind of procrastinator I am. Oh, and then that page took me to another page so I could see my Chinese zodiac sign as a cartoon. Shit! I’m off on a tangent. Ok, back on track, I need a song. Oh, I love this song, is there an actual video? Hmmm, doesn’t look like it, but look at all this Lil Jon! I didn’t even realize I liked that much Lil Jon. If you need a NSFW laugh, go watch this video. I laughed so freaking hard and that’s why it takes forever to get a damn post done.
It’s a new day and I have a new opportunity to work myself into the schedule that I’ve set for myself. I’m fully aware of how time-blocking is supposed to work and if I am doing A when I’m supposed to be doing B, then when it’s time for B, I need to make it up with A. My rational mind knows this, but my rational mind isn’t very often running shit. So yesterday I got all off of my schedule and let the whole day go down in flames. I’m going to try to do better today. I have high hopes for myself. If I don’t keep getting sidetracked by YouTube. Damn, I’m a mess. Videos from the 90s give me life. And I feel like I need to learn some Thong Song choreography.
This morning I thought for a moment that maybe I have a little ADD or ADHD or something to that effect. I do find it difficult to stay focused these days. Perhaps not though. But is this one of those things where “they” say “just apply yourself” but dude, I’m trying. I just put a thin layer over here and a thin layer over there and that’s why nothing ever gets fully covered lol. And I keep adding things to the palette. It never ends. What is wrong with me?!?!? Seriously, right now I have a full-time job, a part-time job, a 200 hr yoga training to take, 3 ambassadorships (I mean, that’s just posting on IG but still), and 3 little side hustles that I’m trying to get into position. See? Why?
My standard M.O. is to pile on all these things, start one or two, get overwhelmed because I took on too much and then quit everything. I’m trying really hard to avoid that this time. I mean, I can’t quit the full-time job, lol. The part-time job is scheduled kinda like the full-time one with considerably less hours, obviously, so that one is also easy to have on the schedule. It’s the rest of the things that are what are gonna try to knock me down. Calendars and lists are gonna save my life and my sanity and get me on the right track. This is it! This is my time. Let’s go, let’s work!