goals

New Week, New Posts, & Some Realizations

Where does the time go?? I just recently asked how I could get five more hours in between about 5 and 10pm. Wouldn’t you enjoy that? More time to work out, more time to stretch, more time to pole dance? Of course you want that! Make it happen, science!

Last week was a blur. A lazy blur. But, I’m back on the wagon. Getting those workouts in (using Fitocracy..it’s like dog shaming but with exercise), trying to write (see? Here I am!), and just generally being a cooler me. In order to be that cooler me, I have to realize and accept that waiting until Sunday to do things is the same as saying, eff it, I’m not gonna do it. I could be queen of the procrastination club if I could make it to meetings…maybe next week.

Remember Second Saturdays? Where I go get a massage? A deep tissue massage? I did at least do that. I have a lovely bruise on my ass to show for it. Hopefully, as I continue to stretch, things will continue to loosen up and I won’t be putting myself through this torture of trying to break up 5 year old scar tissue for nothing. My desire for deep tissue massage, oddly enough, goes along with why I shouldn’t partner stretch. In partner stretching, I’ll just do my best to keep relaxing into whatever stretch my partner is pushing me into (except splits) which ultimately leads to me over-stretching and not being able to walk for a couple days. Massage is the same. The masseuse is in there just digging away with her elbows and I just do my best to breathe through it. She’s the first person who has even come close to making me want to wave the white flag. Did I let her go too far? Possibly. I think she might have moved a rib, but that’s why I have a chiropractor. After she was done and we were chatting, she told me that she was starting to wonder if I was still alive because most people would have been crying out in pain when she was as deep as she was.  Yeah, well. I’m tough. Or stupid. Take your pick.

I have another post coming shortly after this one all about pole, hooray!  You’ll need to be familiar with Star Trek and the Borg, so get on over to Wikipedia and start studying so you’re not left out!

Speaking of pole, someone needs to get on the ball. A mere 3.5 weeks until the showcase and I’ve knocked out a staggering 30 seconds of my personal routine. And I still have another 90 seconds of the group routine to choreograph. I must be crazy. Yep, that’s a definite. I think the rest of this week will just fly on by in its usual inconsiderate way. And speaking of which still, I’m out of time. Grrrr.  Have a great day!!

What Time Is It?!?!


Morris Day & The Time – The Bird by coolfunk

Yeah, that’s right. It’s time to take it old skool. Quit pretending you don’t know. (Except for those few of you who REALLY don’t know due to your age, lol.)

Why? I have no idea. It’s just what was in my head when I woke up. That, and the thought of staying in bed for another 45 minutes and not doing any stretching.

Stretching won. But, stretching didn’t win because I have this awesome willpower to get up and try to make my body do things that make it scream, “THIS BITCH!”, stretching won because I feel bad if I have the alarm set and Hubby wakes up to wake me up and then I don’t get up and I have roused him from slumber for no reason.

Yes, my exercise routine is based on a guilt trip that I planned without the assistance of my local travel agency.

Hey, welcome to Thursday! Another week nearly down the tubes. It’s been a great week though.

Monday we focused a bit on conditioning in Spin Pole, which is going to become a focus of my class. Beautiful, spinning inverts in 2013! Spin is followed by Groove Shop where we started working on our number for the showcase. These ladies are gonna crush it. I love them. They’re all channeling their inner ‘bad bitch’ and giving all the attitude necessary to dance to this song. I cannot wait to finish up the choreography in a couple of weeks so that we can just polish and be Number One Stunnas! (You know, except for the fact that I’m not actually performing with Team Groove Shop, just doing the choreography. I’ll be  performing separately, and hopefully sexily with Lenny K a little later in the show.)

Tuesday, when we could stop laughing for 30 seconds, we worked on some fun stuff, some stuff that requires either strength, flexibility, or insanity that I don’t yet have. But also worked on that beauty of a handspring and the Ayesha-Straight Edge-Brass Monkey combo. I wonder how long I could hold that elbow grip straight edge…fun contest that would be.

Yesterday was my “relax” day.That just means I didn’t go anywhere after work, lol.

Today I’m finally getting an insurance appraisal on my ring. Tomorrow is a trip to the chiropractor, thankfully.  I’m in need.

Saturday is Second Saturday, so either you’ve been reading and you know what’s up, or you can go look it up, lol.

Sunday is StudioShyne, where the pole goes up and I may dance around the living room like a total fool. Life is good.

Crap, it’s gone and gotten late and I still have to nuke my oatmeal to a million degrees so that I can’t eat it for twenty minutes and then I’m late and my whole day is off schedule.  The horror!

I’ll ramble more to ya later. Till then……..tell ’em, Morris.

Happy New Year….Yesterday

Hi there, 2013, you sexy beast.

Glad to be out of 2012.  The end of the year, by far, is the worst for me.  Not simply because I don’t actually enjoy the end-of-year holiday madness, but because I tend to get strapped for time and therefore lazy about my working out.  Inevitably, I start the year with the November/December fat pooch.  Ugh. 

BUT, that pooch can’t slow me down.  I’m going to punch it with cardio and ab work until it gives up and slinks away, oh I don’t know, maybe into my ass although probably not, but away from my midsection.  I might even have to attend a CrossFit class (you know who you are) although probably not because it doesn’t look 100% safe to me and I don’t want to look like a CrossFit chick.  I have enough problems with bulking up.  Anywho, this week has been a success so far.  This is blog post 2 of 3.  I’ve handled 1 of 2 weights days and 2 of 3 cardio days.  Still lots to do and lots to look forward to, but I’m feeling good.

I’m on a financial diet, even though the Hubby likes to remind me that we aren’t poor, to make up for the fact that I’m not on a food diet.  Screw that.  I’m not trying to be in a bodybuilding competition, I just want to be fit.  So fuck yeah, I’m having that cookie.  And I might eat its best friend also.  That’s how I do.  But in the realm of that financial diet (read: budget), I try considerably harder not to cheat.  I guess I’m a hoarder.  A money hoarder.  Just call me Scrooge McDuck.  (Duck Tales.  Woo Oooh.)

I’m turning over a new leaf.  I’m not going spending crazy by any means, but I am going to institute S4 or Second Saturday Spa Sessions.  One delicious, deep tissue, trigger point, get deeper, use your friggin elbow, if I’m not grunting you’re not deep enough massage per month.  A little treat to keep me focused on working out since this is my reward for staying on track.  This month, I’ll be trying a local place that has a chiropractor (although I already have one of those that I like) and masseuses that are more focused on rehabbing from injuries.  Hopefully they’ll be “the ones”.  If not, I have a couple of other places lined up to try.

In other news, part of the reason I’m fighting this pooch is the breadmaker that I got.  So far, I’m 4 loaves in and have yet to get one to come out that didn’t fall.  Fortunately, even when they do fall, they’re still yummy.  Or maybe that’s unfortunately.  Either way, I’m gonna keep trying until I get it right.  And when I do, I’ll be stoked to make all kinds of crazy yummy concoctions in there.  This is why I work out.  So I can eat bread and lots of it.

Hey, somebody remind me to post a picture or something of where I am with my splits progress, ok?  How else am I going to know if I’m getting anywhere or if I’m stuck in the same place I’ve been?  Thanks.  I knew I could count on you.

Well, I hate to write and run, but…actually I just hate to run.  See you Friday when I may bring back the ROCO Friday tradition.  Peace!

See ya, 2012!

<insert deep breath here>

Peace out, 2012. You were pretty fun, but I am SO over you and ready to move on.

Of course it’s that time of year where folks set up some New Year’s resolutions for themselves.  Let me look back a year to see if I made this futile effort last year…..damn, you’re still there?  Well, the answer was no, I didn’t. The year before either.  I’m smarter than I thought.  This year, my uber-intelligence continues as I will not make resolutions for the year. I will, however, make weekly goals that would help me attain my “New Year’s resolutions” that I’m not making.  I’m just being realistic here. Because I know me. Oh, in addition to the weekly goals, I am thinking also a monthly pole goal (that is composed of two points).

And so, so let it be written, so let it be done. I’m getting a head start.

The January Pole Goal: Brass Monkey (pole), Michelle’s crazy floor swipe (floorwork).  There, I said it.  Not so bad, and attainable as long as I just work on them. With all credit to Pole Dance Dictionary (love them), here’s a picture of the Brass Monkey:

Brass Monkey
Brass Monkey

And if you tell me how easy this move is, I will straight up go Cartman on you and kick you in the NUTS! It could be easy though, I just haven’t really tried it out yet. So maybe your nuts are safe. Likely that if you’re reading this you don’t even have any (except Bob, Conrad, and Joe).

I cannot show you Michelle’s floor swipe thingy, or at least I can’t link to it currently. She actually calls it a Hand Press Leap. If you know anything of pole dance and/or anything of Michelle, then you know it’s fantastic. Period.

And sooner in January would be better than later in January as I would really like to have both of these moves in my routine for the February showcase. Goals? I haz them.

So, right now, my pole move list has 16 moves on it.  Plenty to get me through the year at one a month and obviously a few extra for those months that I’m working extra hard.

That is actually the part of “goal setting” and achieving that will likely be easy. The remainder, not so much, mainly due to time constraints. I’m still going to try to make it happen.

2013 is the year of the book. I’ve been sitting on this chick lit story forever and since Ms. Mattas said it’s book writing year, then let’s get on it.

2013 is the year of front splits. I really am close enough that if I put in serious work on it, I’d be on the floor by my 40th birthday. Let’s get on it.

2013 will hold a couple other things, I’m sure, but surprises are fun. And without further ado, for me more than for you, I present the Monday Musings, or Sh!t I Wanna Do This Week:

  • 2 cardio sessions (1 down, 1 to go)
  • 2 weight sessions
  • 3 stretching sessions
  • 1 foam rolling session
  • 2 pole sessions
  • 2  1 hour writing sessions
  • 3 blog sessions

Not bad. I think I can do this. Who needs sleep, right?

I’ve put these things out into the universe. May they not come back and sucker punch me.

Have a wonderful (AND SAFE!!!) New Year’s Eve folks! See you next year and be ready to rock and roll!

Two-a-days

I guess that my agent didn’t hear about the new CBA since I’m going to be running two-a-days until Halloween. Let’s see what gives out first: my body or my will.  I’m guessing will.

As per the norm, I’m finding that change in routine is difficult to adapt to.  Changed my work hours and wanted to remember to take my vitamin and fiber thus morning. Well, I got to work on time at least.

A quick goal update:

P90X – alternating through three of the routines in the mornings
Pole – twice at home, once in the studio. Win!
Stretching – done and done. About 3 inches shy of that front split
Reading – slacking but taking lunch break starting this week to get some done
Teaching – not entirely within my control but still working. Steady Wednesdays next month!!

That’s about it. It may be rainy, or perhaps not where you are, but get out there and make it a fantastic day!!