Yikes, y’all. I can clearly see why I get nothing done. Now, can I somehow make myself fix it?
I give myself this time period to empty my head of these random thoughts before I fill it up again. When I write these, the first step is to find a song that somehow correlates to what I’m rambling about for the day. This is usually the first step in my downfall of how I don’t get something posted. Today it looked like this: I need a song about putting things off or getting things done. Off to Google and then down the rabbit hole. I ended up on lists of songs about procrastination (which I didn’t really want). Oh, then I needed to know what kind of procrastinator I am. Oh, and then that page took me to another page so I could see my Chinese zodiac sign as a cartoon. Shit! I’m off on a tangent. Ok, back on track, I need a song. Oh, I love this song, is there an actual video? Hmmm, doesn’t look like it, but look at all this Lil Jon! I didn’t even realize I liked that much Lil Jon. If you need a NSFW laugh, go watch this video. I laughed so freaking hard and that’s why it takes forever to get a damn post done.
It’s a new day and I have a new opportunity to work myself into the schedule that I’ve set for myself. I’m fully aware of how time-blocking is supposed to work and if I am doing A when I’m supposed to be doing B, then when it’s time for B, I need to make it up with A. My rational mind knows this, but my rational mind isn’t very often running shit. So yesterday I got all off of my schedule and let the whole day go down in flames. I’m going to try to do better today. I have high hopes for myself. If I don’t keep getting sidetracked by YouTube. Damn, I’m a mess. Videos from the 90s give me life. And I feel like I need to learn some Thong Song choreography.
This morning I thought for a moment that maybe I have a little ADD or ADHD or something to that effect. I do find it difficult to stay focused these days. Perhaps not though. But is this one of those things where “they” say “just apply yourself” but dude, I’m trying. I just put a thin layer over here and a thin layer over there and that’s why nothing ever gets fully covered lol. And I keep adding things to the palette. It never ends. What is wrong with me?!?!? Seriously, right now I have a full-time job, a part-time job, a 200 hr yoga training to take, 3 ambassadorships (I mean, that’s just posting on IG but still), and 3 little side hustles that I’m trying to get into position. See? Why?
My standard M.O. is to pile on all these things, start one or two, get overwhelmed because I took on too much and then quit everything. I’m trying really hard to avoid that this time. I mean, I can’t quit the full-time job, lol. The part-time job is scheduled kinda like the full-time one with considerably less hours, obviously, so that one is also easy to have on the schedule. It’s the rest of the things that are what are gonna try to knock me down. Calendars and lists are gonna save my life and my sanity and get me on the right track. This is it! This is my time. Let’s go, let’s work!
I’m pretty sure this is how the Universe feels about me.
If you’re lost you can look and you will find me Time after time If you fall, I will catch you, I’ll be waiting Time after time
For as put-together as I may seem (to some people), the Universe basically knows I’m lost but it’s there for me if I look. Universe says it’s ok to try crazy shit, go ahead and if you fall, I got you. Universe is the net under my rig. I don’t consciously think about it often, but Universe is and always has been on my side. I have legit done some absolutely ridiculous (and a couple fucking dangerous) things and have walked away unscathed.
Not so long ago, like last week, you may recall that I asked the Universe for some guidance. Literally less than a week ago. It’s two posts ago, if that. Well, yesterday, Universe lobbed up a slow one that even I could hit. It’s really wild what can happen if you get out of your own way and allow good ole Universe to do her thing.
So, she said, ‘Hey, you have this base of knowledge in these things and you enjoy doing it so maybe learn just a little bit more about it and then monetize it.’ Well, yeah, Universe, that kinda applies to a bunch of things since I’m a Jill-of-all-trades, mistress of none. Pretty sure she sighed heavily and then talked to me like I was a 4 year-old and put some links in my face over and OVER AND OVER until I finally got the message. I got the message!
Universe ought to know by now that I don’t do well with subtlety. I have never been one who understands these little things. I am a stomp upon entry, stomp all around, stomp out the door kinda girl and that’s what I understand. If you tell me you want a cookie, I get you a cookie. If you tell me the grass is green, I get that the grass is green. If you are not being straightforward and you are trying to tell me something, it isn’t likely that it’s going to register with me. Not because I’m not listening, but because I’m blunt (Sagittarius all day long) and I expect the same from everyone else. Because of this, it’s likely that I’ve missed out on a few opportunities that Universe tried to provide. I feel that it’s also ok because if I were REALLY supposed to have something, then I would have it. This line of thinking has seemed to work for the past 47 years, so I’m gonna stick with it.
I’m not at the point where I’m ready to say what I’m up to just yet. But I feel like maybe a few side hustles are about to make their way into my life and I’m going to just roll with them and enjoy the process.
Oh, completely related to absolutely nothing, I held my handstand for 20 solid seconds today. Boom. All that is on IG. SunnyzSpinz if you want to go look. See ya later!
You just know it’s Monday when your gimbal battery is dead, your earbud batteries are dead, your Kindle battery is dead, and your over-the-ear headphone batteries are dead. How the heck did that happen, and especially when I wanted to use pretty much all of them before 9am?!?! Perhaps it’s a sign? (Everything is a sign in my book, ok? Just roll with it.) A sign that I should pay better attention to when my shit needs plugged in probably.
I know you’re just chomping at the bit, waiting to know how today’s video ties in to whatever I’m blathering on about today. Far be it from me to keep you waiting.
You see, I’m one of those people who is pretty much in constant discomfort. Not all out pain, although that happens now and again, but daily I ache. Literally, every day, every night, every movement is either a hip or a knee or a shoulder or foot or whatever going, HEY! REMEMBER ME! I’M HERE AND I’M GONNA HURT A LITTLE TO REMIND YOU! That was every day. Did you notice how I changed the tense? Yaaaaaaaaas, girl. It’s past tense now.
I mean, we’re not talking full-out magic where I’m floating on a cloud with unicorns and glitter, but sleeping through the night, not feeling like I’m 95 when I get out of my chair, not thinking I’m gonna tumble back down the stairs as I climb them because I think a knee or hip is gonna give out. You know what changed my world? C motherfucking BD. That’s right, CBD oil. It’s not snake oil.
Look, I know the medicinal properties as well as the recreational properties of THC. The THC helped my dad to eat when nothing else would near the end of his journey. The THC helps me not snap the fuck out on some of y’all. But this potent ass CBD? It’s like magic. Scientifically backed magic. Now, when I say scientifically backed, I don’t mean that I’m a scientist, but I know that this has been researched. In my own personal experience, I’m running about .25 ml sublingually every day.
A big draw of CBD and THC is the reduction of inflammation and apparently I had a LOT of inflammation. THC alone doesn’t get it, but baby that CBD (broad-spectrum people) does the job. I’ve been so accustomed to being uncomfortable all the time that NOT being in pain is all weird to me. I’m not saying that I don’t have ANY discomfort at all any more cuz THAT would be magic, but to say the discomfort has been cut by 90% is not an exaggeration. If you’re wondering what I’m using, you can see it here.
So yeah, I’ve been feeling myself. I’m not in pain, I’m working out, my hips are opening, my face is clearing, the scale number is going down, and I’m damn near ready for hot girl summer. One wouldn’t think it (I hope, and if I’m wrong and just no one had the balls to say anything I’m coming for you) wasn’t super noticable that my weight skyrocketed when we came to Florida. It looked like this:
June 2018 – Left Colorado at a svelte 131 pounds.
July 2018 – Keeping a strong 129 pounds because cleaning and unpacking a house seems to take more energy than packing and cleaning a house.
September 2018 – Rocking 128 pounds as I study for my real estate exam and everything that comes with it and after it. This time is also known as the end of hot girl summer.
December 2018 – 134 pounds. Not concerned, things are fine. I’m a Realtor. Haven’t made any money yet. Don’t know a damn thing yet.
April 2019 – 140 pounds. I legit didn’t weigh myself for four months. That’s how one starts slipping. I’m still a Realtor and I’m elbows deep in it. I’m also not enjoying it.
May 2019 – 144 pounds. Packing them on. I think I actually hate real estate at this point.
July 2019 – 148 pounds. Fuck. I know that I hated real estate by this point. I’m questioning all kinds of life choices but somehow not my food yet.
November 2019 – 151.4 pounds. Heaviest I’ve ever been in my life including pregnancy. Looking back now, I realize that I was depressed at this time. Kicked real estate to the curb and went back to using my brain to make money.
December 2019 – 150 pounds. SEE? I’m getting better already?
January 2020 – 154 pounds. Maybe not.
February 2020 – Hi pandemic. Hi 155 pounds. I’m 5’3′ with big boobs. This is not a good look for ME. I look like a barrel.
March 2020 – FUCK MY LIFE!! 156 pounds. Pandemic in full swing bitches. But this is too much. I don’t like seeing myself. FIX IT EXERCISE JESUS!
THIS RIGHT HERE! NOBODY SAID ANYTHING. Y’ALL KNEW I WAS TOO HEAVY AND YOU AIN’T SAY A DAMN THING. AIGHT, BET.
April 2020 – Realizing that I’ve gained TWENTY-FIVE POUNDS since we came to sea level and swearing to fix it. 153 pounds.
May 2020 – Working. 152 pounds.
June 2020 – This is so slow. 151 pounds.
July 2020 – I thought you could lose 2.2 pounds a week?!?! 150 pounds.
August 2020 – 149 pounds.
September 2020 – Certified to teach FabPole. Lost two pounds only. Discouraging but gonna keep going. Right now, 140 is the goal. 148 pounds.
October 2020 – No kids in this hood. No candy in the house. 146 pounds.
November 2020 – Holidays are coming, how will I do? 145 pounds.
December 2020 – As long as I stay on track. 146 pounds.
January 2021 – New year’s resolutions and all keeping me on track. Oh yeah, back then I said new day resolutions. 145 pounds.
February 2021 – Homebodies for life? 144 pounds.
March 2021 – It’s been a year since I topped out. 142 pounds.
April 2021 – GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL! 140 pounds. First goal met. Only took a year to lose 15 pounds.
May 2021 – We aren’t done with this month, obviously, but my average right now is 139. Still on that one pound a month track. So at this rate, I’ll be back to my Colorado weight in another 8 months.
I didn’t think that my activity levels had changed from when we were in Colorado, however, a Facebook memory popped up of my whiteboard calendar from there from a month and I was doing something exercise-related about 6 days a week and that was outside of my regular morning workout. Basically, I was a beast. When we moved here, I turned into a slug.
All the slug time is over. I have 8 more pounds to lose and dammit I’m gonna make it happen. I think that a huge part of this weight loss came from removing alcohol from my diet. If you really know me, you know that I enjoy(ed) boozing. But an MRI for something unrelated said I had a fatty liver (go figure…how many nights at Carlos ‘n Charlie’s do you really think you can endure?!?) so I needed to drastically reduce my alcohol consumption. So I quit. Cold turkey. Just like that. I’d say that in the last year, I’ve had 5 or less alcoholic beverages and every time I’ve felt like shit. Not hard to give up.
Ok, this turned into much more than I meant it to be. But that’s not so bad either. I still have a topic for tomorrow. Win! Look at who might get back to blogging on the regular!
Oh hai there! Have a little Dee Snyder with your Cheerios.
I’ve been thinking about this a bunch recently. Not sure why, but it’s been on my mind. I mean, I have a job. I don’t, by any means, dislike it, but I also don’t LOVE it. I don’t pop out of bed on Monday morning stoked for another day of doing what I do. Sure, most people don’t pop up like that either, but some folks do and I’ve been feeling like I wanna be a some folks. When I think about the couple of times when I really did enjoy going to work, it was more about the people that I worked with than the work itself.
So, Universe, how do I fix it? Also, Universe, I’ve already seen the Venn diagram of what I’m good at/what I love/blah blah blah. I’m a Sagittarius, enneagram 7, DiSC high C (I think, it’s been a while), ENTP-A (Debater), under-active sacral and heart chakra, Strategic CliftonStrategy, extroverted, adrenaline junky, somewhat exhibitionist kinda person. Do with that what you will. Make all that madness come together in a career I’d jump out of bed for. I’ll be over here doing one of the million things that I dabble in while I wait. But, if you could move it along, yeah, that’d be great.
In the meantime, I guess I’ll just keep doing what I do. You know, the day job plus teaching a handstand workshop here and there, chilling with my flowmies, learning to roller skate again, being a NamasteAsFuck ambassador, and being a FabPole Instructor Affiliate. But I’ll always tell you I don’t do anything, lol.
Oh, sidebar Universe. Whatever it is, please don’t make it that I have to talk on the phone. I really am not here for that. I mean, I know people can’t see me when I roll my eyes at them, but people can’t see me when I roll my eyes at them. And I do this A LOT. Like I’m surprised my eyes haven’t fallen out of my head a lot.
You know sometimes I try to hit a word count here, but I don’t have anything else to say but I have a lot of other things to do today, soooooo…..deuces!
I used to have an almost daily blogging habit. Those were also the times that I had to leave the house for work, drive in shitty traffic, sit in a freezing cold office, and work for a horrible human. I had A LOT to say. But of course, things change (thankfully) and now I don’t leave the house for work (nor will I ever again if I can help it) so there’s no traffic (unless I bump into Lovey in the hallway) and I can put on or take off as much clothing as I want (or use a space heater) and my boss is GREAT! So yeah, my life is kinda boring right now. But boring in the best possible way.
I do leave the house once a week to teach my fabulous FabPolers. This past week, on my way home, I’m cruising with the windows down and the music waaaaaay up. I was jamming out to some K7 (Let’s Bang) and singing and dancing. Yes, I’m THAT person in the car and I have no intention of changing. I was sitting at a light in the left hand lane and a car pulls up beside me. I notice out of the corner of my eye that the person is trying to get my attention. Out of concern that something may have been amiss, I rolled down my front passenger window. (Driver and rear passenger were down in case you’re wondering how I was heard/seen) Eye rolling ensues.
Him: *Black man of undetermined origin. Handsome but definitely not my type. Older.* Hi! Can I enjoy the music with you?
Me: Uh, sure. *rolls down window further and turns it up*
Him: *gesturing wildly* I am 941
Me: Oh, nope. I’m married. Not trying to get those digits.
Him: Oh! No, no. This is you?
Me: What?
*longest fucking red light ever*
Him: This song. It is you?
Me:*laughing hysterically* NO! This is not me. The band is called K7.
Him: K7?
Me:Yes.
Him: Ok. Thank you. You have a wonderful day!
Me: You too!
These are the days of my life. I am a magnet for just strange things. Keeps life interesting though, I suppose.
Well, I guess I’m gonna wrap up here. I’m up to get my boobs smashed. See ya!
