On Church

Happy April! It’s a post from me and it’s not even an April Fool’s joke.


This morning, after my pre-vacation vanity workout and secondary workout and yoga poses (overachieve much?), I hit the shower. Whilst in there, a little ditty popped into my head. Before I tell you what it was, let me expound upon the title of today’s post.


You see, I was brought up in the church (Baptist), as many Black folks my age probably were. Church every Sunday and I went to a private church school for kindergarten through fourth grade. I’m sure that this affects everyone differently, but for me, it ingrained a pretty nasty fear of dying and going to hell. It was the worst possible thing that could happen. Literally, there was nothing worse. I don’t agree with fear as a motivator as an adult. I doubt that I agreed with it as a child.


I figure I was about 10 or so before the Sunday morning church runs became less frequent and I’m sure that I was at least 19 before I defied the rules and just didn’t go.


Sidebar: Defying the rules: Mom said everyone HAD to go to church. This didn’t include my Dad. Never did. He was my hero, lol. I got dressed, got in my car, and for a while, I just drove around. I eventually ended up in a local park. Ran into my neighbor. We sat around and talked and enjoyed the day. I called it the Church of the Great Outdoors. Sorry, Mom.


As you can see, organized religion and I have a rocky past. Would I say that I’m religious now? No, I wouldn’t. Spiritual, maybe, but not religious. So imagine my surprise when this morning, as I’m standing in the shower, the only thing that continually pops into my head is “The joy of the Lord is my strength.” Oh yes, a long ago memory surfaced and wanted to make itself known. Since my grandmother was really the church leader of the family, I like to think that it’s her just sending me a little message to know she’s keeping an eye on me.


This isn’t the only thing from a long ago past that likes to resurface. Sometimes I remember how to sing “Oh, how I love Jesus” in sign language. Other times, I can name all of the books in the New Testament because, of course, they put it to song. I’m pretty good at bible categories in Jeopardy, so thanks for that, I guess, church.


These days, I don’t do church. I just try to be nice and respectful to others and not do things that I know are just wrong. If I were going to be “religious”, my religion of choice would likely be Wicca. The divine, the feminine, nature, Goddesses. Maybe underneath it all, the lack of a strong female, one who is actually running shit, is what pushed me away from organized religion. Think about it.


Anywho, enough about religion or my lack thereof. And on to my holy shit moment of the day.


I get a lot of junk mail and while I know it’s a waste of paper and I could opt out of it, like bible songs, it’s ingrained in me. Growing up, we had a little bouncy flag on our mailbox on the other side of the “mailman pick up my mail” flag. When that bouncy flag was up, we knew the mail had come. I LOVED going to get the mail. Now, I still LOVE getting the mail. It’s usually junk, but it’s just some perverse pleasure for me.


Well, yesterday, as I was opening my junk, I saw an offer to refinance my car. A point off my interest rate and the same amount of time remaining? Um, yes please? So I jumped through their hoops and what do you know, I got refinanced. You guys, this is serious. I just dropped nearly $200 off of my monthly car payment. I am SO STOKED! That extra loot is gonna come in handy without a doubt. And all of this right after I just made my last payment so I know everything will get worked out before the next one would have been due. Did I mention that I’m stoked?!?!


Ok, that’s enough for one day. I hope that you don’t fall a victim to any pranks today. Have a kickass hump day. Because, “Gary, it’s Wednesday!”




Say What?