This bout is scheduled for, oh, I'd guess another 50 or so years.
In the red corner, weighing in at just under 7 pounds, the Wii Fit Balance Board! WFBB has a record of outrageous sales, minimal complaints, and for some, actual exercise value.
In the blue corner, weighing in at about 3 pounds, my brain. The Gray Matter has a record of crazy thoughts, funny outbursts, and mostly not going haywire.
Damas y caballeros, ahora veremos quien es el mas macho!
<cut to pre-recorded video>
Interviewer: So, are you ready for this battle?
WFBB: I'm about to show the brain the truth!
Interviewer: The brain is undefeated. How do you feel about that?
WFBB: That's because the brain hasn't gone up against me.
<fade to black, fade back in>
Interviewer: Are you at all concerned about your upcoming bout with the WFBB?
Brain: Nah, man, I can take the BB. I run this body!
Interviewer: The WFBB claims that you've been telling half-truths about the body.
Brain: Look, I was here before the WFBB and I'll be here after the WFBB. We'll settle this in the ring.
<DING, DING>
Here's the thing. My weight fluctuates between about 126 and 132. 6 freaking pounds. You would think that 6 pounds wouldn't make that big of a difference in how I look. WRONG!
This is where the fight between the brain and the WFBB comes in. The brain will somehow think that we look awesome today, but WFBB will come in and say, "Awww, hell no. You're on the high end of your limit today, fatty." Other days, the brain will say, "Good Lord, are you putting on your winter weight?!?!" and WFBB says, "Hey, look at you all down at 126!"
Good God, I forgot where this post was going.
Nevermind.