It's grocery day! Woot!
No, not really. Grocery shopping sucks. But gas is under $2 so I'll take that in trade.
So, we walked into the store and were in the process of grabbing a cart, buggy, whatever you choose to call it. Right there were an older man and an older woman. Here's what transpired:
OL: <standing there minding her own business>
OM: <sidling up to the OL>
(I'm not sure of the exact question because I wasn't 100% paying attention AND I don't speak Spanish)
OM: Cuantos anos tiene?
OL: What? I don't understand you! I'm American!!
I'm sorry, but HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Seriously, the great majority of the people around the area in which I live just expect everyone to speak Spanish. The little old lady's response was priceless.
Look, I know we're all (or
most somea few) adults here and we don't need to be lectured about what to do or not to do while driving. We heard it when we first started, some of it stuck, some of it didn't. Fair enough. But when I learned to drive, the only distraction was the radio. I wasn't putting on makeup or changing a CD or talking on my cell phone. I don't long for those days, but I think that some people need them.
Not even an hour ago, I went to pick my daughter up from gymnastics. On the way back home, we stopped at Publix (grocery store for those who don't have them) for a few items. All was well. As we were walking back to the car, my daughter was telling me a story. Now, living in Miami, nothing ever gets your full attention, not even driving, and I realize this as I'm guilty of it myself. So, what I'm trying to say is I was only listening to her with one ear. (And if you have a teenage child, you know you really only need one ear to listen to them as most stories repeat.) We weren't, as some people do, walking down the middle of the isle. We were to the right, close to the parked cars. On the opposite side, there was a Jetta backing out. To this, I don't pay spectacular attention because the Jetta has plenty of room.
Apparently, Jettas are now roughly the size of 18 wheelers judging by how far this driver had to back up. This is not social commentary on said driver's driving skills though. Well, yes it is. The Jetta continues to back up, and not at a rate of speed that is suitable in a grocery store parking lot. You really don't realize how long 3 seconds is until you are about to be hit by a car. I had my purse and keys in one hand and a twelver of Heiney Light in the other therefore, I wasn't able to produce my initial reaction of slamming my hand into the trunk of her car. (Yes, it was a woman driver. Go ahead. I've heard it all before.) Instead, I used what I had left. My big-ass mouth.
As she continued to back up, I yelled out "Hey!". Oh how I wish I could've done more. I am pretty sure, however, that I was vocal enough for her to hear me. Either that or she had backed out enough for a double-wide to get out. At any rate, this is when I notice that she was on the friggin telephone. This only irritated me more. So I continued to yell at her through her closed windows.
"What the hell are you doing?!?! Get the hell off the phone!! You almost hit us!!"
I guess the reaction I was looking for was an apology. Instead, I think I scared the crap out of Miss I'm-so-much-better-than-everyone-that-I-can-back-out-without-regard-to-any-pedestrians-that-may-happen-to-be-around. I'm not sure if she was scared because she almost hit us (and I KNOW she heard me) or if it was because I think my eyes were popping out of my head at that very moment and I probably looked ready to kill. Either way, she was scared and I guess that'll have to be good enough because that's what my daughter and I were. Scared.
So, the moral of the story here folks is please pay attention when you're in crowded places. With pedestrians. Tell your friends. The life you save could be your own. No wait, that's blood donors. But seriously, be careful!
PS. I go to that Publix all the time Ms. Jetta. I know your car, your tag and what you look like. The next time you almost hit someone (especially me or mine), there will be repercussions. 40 acres and a mule!