See ya, 2012!

<insert deep breath here>

Peace out, 2012. You were pretty fun, but I am SO over you and ready to move on.

Of course it’s that time of year where folks set up some New Year’s resolutions for themselves.  Let me look back a year to see if I made this futile effort last year…..damn, you’re still there?  Well, the answer was no, I didn’t. The year before either.  I’m smarter than I thought.  This year, my uber-intelligence continues as I will not make resolutions for the year. I will, however, make weekly goals that would help me attain my “New Year’s resolutions” that I’m not making.  I’m just being realistic here. Because I know me. Oh, in addition to the weekly goals, I am thinking also a monthly pole goal (that is composed of two points).

And so, so let it be written, so let it be done. I’m getting a head start.

The January Pole Goal: Brass Monkey (pole), Michelle’s crazy floor swipe (floorwork).  There, I said it.  Not so bad, and attainable as long as I just work on them. With all credit to Pole Dance Dictionary (love them), here’s a picture of the Brass Monkey:

Brass Monkey
Brass Monkey

And if you tell me how easy this move is, I will straight up go Cartman on you and kick you in the NUTS! It could be easy though, I just haven’t really tried it out yet. So maybe your nuts are safe. Likely that if you’re reading this you don’t even have any (except Bob, Conrad, and Joe).

I cannot show you Michelle’s floor swipe thingy, or at least I can’t link to it currently. She actually calls it a Hand Press Leap. If you know anything of pole dance and/or anything of Michelle, then you know it’s fantastic. Period.

And sooner in January would be better than later in January as I would really like to have both of these moves in my routine for the February showcase. Goals? I haz them.

So, right now, my pole move list has 16 moves on it.  Plenty to get me through the year at one a month and obviously a few extra for those months that I’m working extra hard.

That is actually the part of “goal setting” and achieving that will likely be easy. The remainder, not so much, mainly due to time constraints. I’m still going to try to make it happen.

2013 is the year of the book. I’ve been sitting on this chick lit story forever and since Ms. Mattas said it’s book writing year, then let’s get on it.

2013 is the year of front splits. I really am close enough that if I put in serious work on it, I’d be on the floor by my 40th birthday. Let’s get on it.

2013 will hold a couple other things, I’m sure, but surprises are fun. And without further ado, for me more than for you, I present the Monday Musings, or Sh!t I Wanna Do This Week:

  • 2 cardio sessions (1 down, 1 to go)
  • 2 weight sessions
  • 3 stretching sessions
  • 1 foam rolling session
  • 2 pole sessions
  • 2  1 hour writing sessions
  • 3 blog sessions

Not bad. I think I can do this. Who needs sleep, right?

I’ve put these things out into the universe. May they not come back and sucker punch me.

Have a wonderful (AND SAFE!!!) New Year’s Eve folks! See you next year and be ready to rock and roll!

Aerial Awareness. Or, I Am A Cat

Many moons ago, after my first step off the board, I became addicted to flying trapeze. As my addiction grew, of course, I wanted to learn more and more. And involved in that more and more was flying without safety lines.

In order to reach my goal, there were tests that I needed to pass. Honestly, at the time, it felt like the powers that be were just stalling me for time, but looking back at it now, I know that it was all for good reason. I spent a LOT of time on the trampoline working on those seat drops (easy), swivel hips (easy), back drop (awkward but easy), stomach drop (scorpioned one or two, but got it), a few other moves that include the word drop, and the dreaded back drop to back drop. (Check this site if you want to learn more trampoline stuff.)

What all of this trampolining was teaching me was aerial awareness. Or, in layman’s terms, the ability to know where my body is in the air in relation to the super hard ground. After I finally reached my goal and was given the green light to take my first swing without safety lines, I knew one of the most amazing feelings on earth. There is almost nothing as freeing as sailing through the air, feeling and hearing the wind rush past your face and ears. LOVE! Now add a little flip, twist, or boost into the air and life has gotten even better.

I was able to continue my journey without safety lines for quite some time before that trampoline training actually came into play. You see, I’m a creature of habit and I get distracted when things are outside of the norm. So, on that fateful day, when there were about 5 people on the board rather than our usual 2 or 3, yes, I was distracted.

Let me preface the next part of this story with this: I have issues with pointing my toes. I know 1000% full well how awful flexed feet look in a performance (when it isn’t intentional). I work on it, I really do, but sometimes, my feet just want to be flexed.

I took off the board, throwing my uprise shoot (click to see video…not of me). Distracted. Not thinking of every detail of the trick. Down to my feet. My damnned flexed feet. My damnned flexed feet that caught on the bar and took me from uprise shoot to downward dive in a millisecond. A full trapeze trick from board to catcher and back to the board lasts about about 15 seconds. Practicing that trick to the net about half that time. In that about 8 seconds of trick time, about 1.5 of those are spent going to the net. 1.5 seconds is not a long time. Except if you’re falling head first towards the net. Time slows down when you just might break your neck.

Aerial Awareness training, ACTIVATE! Form of, a trampoline! Shape of, the person practicing on that nice, safe trampoline!

So here’s what’s going through my head in those 1.5 seconds: Tuck? Take it to my back? Tuck? Take it to my back? OSHITHERECOMESTHENETJUSTUCKANDSAVEYOURLIFE!!!! And so I tucked it in and landed nice and safely. I think I scared a person or two. But I made it. All that trampoline work was not for naught. Thank you.

Fast forward twelve years. Geez….twelve years. I’m in the studio and I’m trying a new move. Not odd to be trying a new move. Not smart to be trying a new move when I don’t have an out. When I’m head to the floor. When I don’t have a crash mat. And for whatever reason, however it happened, because I honestly couldn’t tell you, in that split second, I was not on the pole. Not with my hands, not with my legs, or feet, or with anything. And you know what? Aerial awareness training kicked in. I don’t think that I “thought”. I simply reacted. I don’t know how it happened, but with my head barely four feet off the floor, I somehow managed to get my feet to the floor first. I am a cat.

I like keeping all of my parts in their full and working capacities, so I likely won’t be making that mistake again. I hope that if you are on the pole trying something new that you won’t do what I do. That you’ll always know your out. That you’ll always have a spot. That you’ll always have a crash mat. Please. I want you around to hear my next rambling post. 🙂