1/30 The April Challenge

So first, a preface.

I saw a post on Facebook a few days back that had writing prompts for the month of April in a sort of challenge form. Knowing that I needed to get back to writing to possibly kickstart actually writing something, this felt like something good to do. I’ve recruited some folks to play along (I think), just as I was pulled in. Here we go.

Five Problems with Social Media

How ironic, seeing that social media is where I found this challenge, but there’s plenty of them. Sorry this will be a bullet pointer rather than an actual blog.

  • Know-it-nothings: We’ve all run across this person, whether the person is on Facebook or sits next to you at work. He claims to know everything about every topic ever presented, but really just talks out of his ass (like Trump, you know?). And the KIN really hates to be called out on his bullshit. Facebook, and to a lesser extent, Twitter, is his playground. And Facebook is where he thrives because so many people will take everything they read there as fucking gospel and then spread that shit like the plague. KINs on Facebook are part of the dumbing down of our society.
  • Wizards: Not like the D&D kids, but fairly closely related to the KINs. These are the people who don’t care if they’re right or wrong, they’re gonna post that bullshit and stand behind it….on Facebook. If you met a wizard on the street, they’d likely be too chickenshit to spew their garbage to you in person, but, much like the Wizard in the Wizard of Oz, they have this great curtain to hide behind while telling themselves they’re tough or important or that their message should be heard. Fuck yinz guys.
  • Unicorns and Glitter:  100% honesty here, I am guilty of this. It doesn’t matter how I try to spin it to myself, I’m still guilty. I post the happy shit, the pleasant shit, the shit that makes you laugh or smile. Personally, I don’t think that my friends want to hear about my cramps or constipation or any other less than awesome thing that’s going on in my life. But life’s not perfect, folks, even though that’s what we portray to our friends. Remember life before social media? When you really talked to your friends face-to-face? So they knew that shit wasn’t perfect even without you changing your profile picture to the biggest fucking smile you have? Your FRIENDS. Not your Facebook friends. The real people who know you and care about if you’re having the best day ever or the worst day of your life and want to hear about both. Social media slowly but surely takes that away, if we let it, of course. Go call your BFF. Call, not text!
  • Savages: Again, keeping it 100, I’m not going to sit here and say that I haven’t laughed at a comment that was “savage”, but it’s like it’s become a goal. Let me see what I can say about this that is the most horrific and insulting thing that will still get a laugh because we’re all morally bankrupt. Why can’t our goal be to be the anti-savage? Let’s start saying things that lift people up instead of tearing them down. I know we won’t because we’re already 30 miles down that highway to hell and there’s no stopping us now.
  • Timesuck : I spend waaaaaaay too much time on social media. Time I could be using to read, or write, or work on the Mighty Methed Out Power Strippers (ha, look them up on Facebook), or doing yoga, or exercising or stretching, or so many other things. I look at Twitter every now and again, and Instagram less more and more, but Facebook, that fucker, just caresses my soul. One minute it’s 7:30 and the next minute it’s 9:00. I really should delete the app from my phone. Hey, maybe I will. For this month. If I can make it that long. I need rehab.

And none of this is April Fool’s. But this, my friends, is definitely the end of this post. See you tomorrow.

Adventures in Acupuncture

So, after quite a few years of general discomfort, physical therapy, chiropractic care, and a severe aversion to needles (yeah I have tattoos and piercings, shut up), yesterday I bit the bullet and had my first acupuncture treatment. And because I don’t do anything half-assed (such a lie), I didn’t have just plain old acupuncture, I had electro-acupuncture.

Fortunately, I’ve been visiting this office for nearly five years now so I have a level of trust with them. I don’t honestly think that I would be able to go to a complete stranger for this. But these folks, they get me, and they basically just give me shit about being a wuss about it, considering some of the other things I do for fun.

Ok, in the room. Laying on the table. Pulling my sweater up over my eyes because NEEDLES! Meanwhile, the doctor is getting a good chuckle out of this. Probably because he knows that my pain tolerance is somewhere close to off the charts and I’m worried about THIS?!?! Of course, my morbid sense of curiosity outweighs my irrational fear of needles and I eventually started to look at what they were up to.

I’d venture to guesstimate that I had about 20 needles going. I know for sure that there were 2 in each hand, 4 in each leg around the ankle, a few around the inside of my knee, and then 4 or 5 more up in the hip area that causes me the most agita. Doc tells me as he’s putting the first needle in and I’m cool because I don’t feel anything. Next needle to go in pinches a little. A whole bunch more that I don’t feel until I feel another one.
Before they even have all of the needles placed, needle number one starts itching like a motherfucker. I can’t reach it to scratch it and I figure I shouldn’t if I could. But I certainly ask why the hell I’m so itchy all of a sudden. It’s normal they say. Means it’s working they say. Umm, ok, I’ll take your word for it.

All the needles are placed, now it’s time to fire me up. Yup, let’s attach some tiny electrodes to the end of some of these tiny needles so we can microjolt you into better health. This wasn’t bad since I’m accustomed to stim, just with pads instead of needles.

And now, the worst part for me, the wait. Since I had needles in my hands with electrodes attached, I couldn’t read or do anything on my phone. Lights out and try to relax. LOL, yeah right. If you know me, you know that sitting still isn’t one of my strong points. Longest 20 minutes of this year. But I made it. Needle removal was no big deal, even the one spot that bled just a little dot and then acted like it was gonna bruise.

Released from the office with instruction to hydrate well. Apparently, in this instance, beer doesn’t count as hydration, or so they say. Bummer because I really had a taste for one. There’s always today though.  And after all of this, what did I learn?

Lessons learned:
·         Acupuncture information, like charts, is not the easiest thing to find on the internet and I am internet SAVVY.
·         Based on what I could remember of where the needles were placed, I seem to have issues in my liver meridian which goes along with my wood qi deficiency. They sorta go hand in hand. And based on ailments I read, I think I’m on the right track.
·         Acupuncture isn’t the worst thing on earth. I don’t love it, but I’ll go again to see what sort of changes, if any come of it.

And there you have it. My pincushion cherry has been popped. Tune in again next week to see if I survive another round.

GET YOURS!

 

Yeah, it’s Monday, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t turn this mutha out. Like it’s Friday night and you just got paid. Hell, like it’s Saturday night and you just got laid. Just get yours. Be like the Dolphins and go balls to the wall, and unfortunately not like the Steelers who were more like balls in your zipper. Sigh. Only a game, and not even one I get paid to play or watch.

Weekend over, back on that exercise route. Even though I slacked this morning and laid in bed, I still got it in at lunch. One bonus to working from home, I suppose, is that no one is gonna smell my sweaty ass if I choose not to shower for a bit.  I’m only offending myself. Ha!

NaNoWriMo is but less than a month away, and while I was originally planning on one story, I think I’m going to switch over to a different one. Actually, just writing this made me think of how the three other stories can tie into the one I plan to write. Sweet. Now it’s just a question of the three then the one or vise versa. Plans, plans, plans! My main character just got a first, middle, and last name, and her initials are just funny.

I had plans for this post, but they’ve gone by the wayside. Hope you are having a great Monday.

 

Step Off, I’m Doing The Hump

 

HUMP DAY!!

It’s a great Wednesday morning to be alive, wouldn’t you say? The sun is shining…ok, it isn’t, it’s actually raining, but hey, still woke up and body parts are still functioning. And since said body parts were still functioning this morning, I took them all down to the dungeon to put them to good use. Three days in a row, lol. 18 more makes it a habit, or so they say. I don’t know that I put full faith in that concept.  I’ll still do my best to get down there and put in work daily, though. Except Sunday. That is a day of rest. And football.

So, body is functioning, but oh so sore. It’s being stubborn and acting like we’ve never worked hard before. And really, we aren’t even working that hard…yet. Knocking down the T25/PiYo hybrid calendar because I’m a Beachbody fool. One of the things I have been amazed at in these last three days is how much less these two programs suck this time around. I swear to you that the first time I popped in a T25 or PiYo workout, I didn’t even make it the whole way through. I gave up. I sucked. Not any more though. Now, I am awesome. A couple levels of it.

Hey, remember our door ghosts? I totally thought that we exorcised ourselves of that particular demon, but just when we got comfortable, that damned garage door went up by itself again. Yesterday, we had tried resetting all of the codes and that kept the door down for a good 12 hours, but alas, the poltergeist has returned. Lovey did some further investigation and it seems that perhaps the super duper laser beam sensors aren’t quite correct as well. It’s always an adventure.

Speaking of adventures, you ever talk to Microsoft support on the phone? It’s probably more of a nightmare than an adventure, going round and round in circles, fighting the language barriers, rephrasing myself 5 different ways, the party never ends! ‘Nuff about that, though. It’s done.

I’m still trying to work out what I want to do, if anything, for my birthday. Maybe I’ll just buy a pole again, lol. That’s less than half of a weekend stay up in the mountains and I’ll keep it forever…or until I sell it again. I guess it’ll partially go the route of, will the landlord allow me to bolt up to the ceiling. I think she will. 🙂  But I need a fallback plan and I don’t have one. Where would you go? What would you do? Keep in mind that the budget is limited to under $1000 and it has to cover two people. See how hard that is?!?! I am totally accepting ideas here. I know it’s my birthday and I should pick, but I just don’t know what to do with myself. So typical.

Welp, much to get done and time keeps on slipping, slipping, slipping, into the future. And happy Back To The Future day if that sort of thing floats your boat. Have a great day and don’t get caught humpin around.

 

Something Strange Is Afoot

 

Happy Tuesday, boos and ghouls. Remember some time back when I thought our house was haunted? Yeah, still is. Or we have an electrical problem. But the ghost theory is more fun.  Our “ghost” problem began last night when Lovey went to put some garbage into the can that’s in the garage. Upon coming back into the house, he commented that it was strange that the garage door was open. Yes, strange indeed.

This morning, upon rising from slumber, I checked the door, and what do you know? Open again. And quite cold in the garage. Ok, door back down. Lovey off to work. 8 am door check: good. 9 am door check: good. 10 am door check: open. DAMMIT! WHY?!?!?!

Made a call to the folks who installed the garage door. To say that the woman who answered the phone wasn’t helpful is a pretty strong understatement. The point that she got across with the most clarity is that they wouldn’t be sending anyone out to look at it. So, I get it, I work in IT, I understand that when I have a problem that I cannot replicate it is hard, if not impossible to troubleshoot. However, necessary to throw other folks under the bus and reiterate on several occasions that you won’t be coming out? Nope. Glad I don’t have to deal with them.

Instead, I turn to my BFF, Google. Being the BFF that it is, Google gave me quite a few things to try to get this problem figured out. Fortunately, we live in a super low crime area, aka a retirement community, where I don’t think anyone farts without the neighborhood being aware. Randomly opening garage doors are a reason I’m happy to live here. A loaded 9mm, and scary assault rifles and shotguns are why I’m not afraid to live here. Bang, bang, I shot you down. (On the real, I hope I never have to do that. I never want to end a life, or even injure someone. I was bummed for a week when I hit a bunny with my car when I was younger.) Currently, still working on working this out. Boy is it annoying.

Made it successfully through day 2 of the self-created workout program. So much legs. So much jelly trying to get back up the stairs. Man, am I getting old. But, don’t tell anyone, least of all me, because I insist on continuing to act like I’m 25 even though my body is sayin, “Hey bitch, you wanna make some real fucking money?” Ha, no, Butters, really it’s just wanting me to take it easy a bit. But no. Snowboard season is coming up and either I prepare now or I pay some dire consequences once we hit the mountain. Be prepared!

And with that, you know what? I’m out. Still tons to do today. Peace!

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